Based on the feedback I got, I have now addressed the changes I was suggested.
I got rid of the opening camera move as well as changing the first camera to a closer shot. I also made the camera follow the character more slowly up the staircase so the audience has a better chance of seeing him kicking the slinky over the edge.
Also I have tried to speed up the animation in some areas, working on the timing. But still I will have to add more animation to further enhance the timing as it can be close to 100 frames between the storytelling poses due to the character standing still and balancing the tray before moving on.
Based on my reference I noticed this big gap between my storytelling poses, which is the reason why I have decided to keep most of my timings until I have more animation to work with.
The most obvious changes to the timing is speeding up the head shake in the beginning and the turn around to continue walking up the stairs in the end after he has passed his obstacles.
As you might have noticed, I have also added more stuff to his tray so it now looks like he is doing a surprise breakfast on the bed.
The boxes in the staircase are placeholders for toys that I will be modeling later on.
With these changes, this is the version I will be sending to Ed Hooks for more feedback and I will start working on my mime task while waiting for his feedback.
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